


Don't tell me what to do

by Tigi



Category: Skulduggery Pleasant - Derek Landy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:20:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23573761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tigi/pseuds/Tigi
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

**Sanguine**

Again he found himself in his beloved Texas in his not so beloved house were he grew up. Slowly he inhaled the air and was grateful that he could at least breathe.

His hand wandered to the scar at his throat and he remebered the feeling to drown in his own blood. The memories were still fresh and painful. He could fell himself gasping for air but it would only blood.

Sometimes he woke up at night coughing and gasping for air, despite the fact that he knew that his airways were fine. Physically was he a fit man again but mentally he was a ruin. At least noone wanted to lock him up anymore. A smile played around his lips. The grand mages officially cleaned him from all his crimes, when they thought he was dying. But soon after the declaration his vitals got better and he lived.

But his life seemed hallow to him.  
True enough, he breathed and talked but something missed.  
The joy had left him and he had done nothing in the last month, apart from repairing the shore and the sink.  
But there was much more to do until the house would look good.  
Somehow Sanguine didn't liked the place.  
He grew up there but it wasn't a childhood he cared to remember.  
He and his father never got along with each other, his father was to cold and no man made to be father.  
Sanguine was a child who wanted at least some warmth, something his father never seemed capable to give him.

I need a job concluded Sanguine.  
He knew that he couldn't go back to killing people, it just seemed so pointless.  
Now he wanted to do something were he didn't destroyed lifes.  
Nit that he suddenly felt the urge to become all good and nice, but he couldn't bear anymore death.

He pulled out a bottle of beer and sat on the front porch.  
Maybe he had a alcoholic problem too he thought.  
But at least no he didn't cared really.

A moving on the road cought his attention.  
Was that truly a horse coming up the road.  
For a moment he felt the urge to flee, because he suspected enemies.  
But why fight? whispered a voice inside him. But Sanguine pushed the thought out of his head. Now enemy of him would ride a horse. They drove Bentlys or travelled by plane. Sanguine eyed the man on the horse closely. He had a second horse following behind him. It appeared that he wore a cowboy hat and boots as well as everything on him screamed Cowboy.

,,Howdy new neighbour."welcomed the stranger him.

,,Howdy."replied Sanguine lifeless. The stranger had long black hair and brown sparkling eyes and a well tanned skin.

,,Ya don't know me. But I'm Sonny and my ma sent me to see if it's true that we've a neighbour."explained the man and dismounted. Sanguine stood up too, more out of habit then anything else.

,,It is true. You've a neighbour."agreed Sanguine.

,,Perfect will you come to dinner with me? My ma said I should bring ya if ya are truly living an'breathing."concluded Sonny. And damn hell Sanguine felt an urge to go with him. Something about the boy seemed to appeal to him. It's the accent he speaks like a true Texan man.

,,Give me a minute to shave and I'm yours."answered Billy-Ray.

,,I'm sure they wouldn't mind ya littel beard."

,,Maybe, but I would."replied Billy-Ray true enough.  
He hated to have a long beard.  
Sonny nodded.  
Suddenly Sanguine began to resemble his manners.  
At least he showered yesterday.

,,Plus you might want to drink or eat something."added Sanguine.

,,No offense dude, but ya house seems like it's only a matter of time before it collapses."

,,Might be, might not be."admitted Billy-Ray ,,But I could bring you some food ir water out."

,,No thanks I'm fine, go and shave."

Sanguine nodded and vanished. I didn't took him long to shave, after all he had still his razor.  
As soon as he finished he looked in the mirror.  
Not a particular good appearance he made,but it could be worse, decided Sanguine.

Sonny had already mounted his horse.

,,I hope you can ride."

,,I hope I can ride too."said Sanguine and went to the other horese.  
It seemed fine to him, a bit old but calm.  
A horse for people who start riding concluded Sanguine.  
With brown fur and a littel white around the mouth, but still strong enough to carry him.

Carefully approached he the horse and let it catch his smell, then he mounted it.  
So far so good.

,,Just follow me. It isn't far."said Sonny and leaded his horse on the road.  
Sanguine turned his hores around and followed him.  
Soon he found a rhythm with the horse.  
It was a long time since he had ridden a horse.  
But soon he felt comfortable in the saddle again.

,,And I thought you're a total Greenhorn."confirmed Sonny.  
Partly because I am thought Sanguine, after all it was some years since he last rode a horse.

,,I am older the you. I am not a Greenhorn."replied Sanguine.

,,No ya aren't older then me. I'm twenty-five and ya must be twenty or twenty-one or even twenty-two years old."replied Sonny amused.

No I am not I am a two hundred fifty year old killer, who isn't killing anymore because I lost my bite.  
But Sanguine wondered if he really looked this young, he was pretty sure that he ought to look older than the other.  
Then he remembered that magicians aged not in the same speed.  
Could be possible that he looked this young, but he felt older.

,,But I feel older."said Sanguine after all.

Then they rode in silence.  
Not much later they came across a ranch and it seemed to be their destination.  
His old hores lifted his head and turned his ears toward the Ranch.  
Probably hoping for food and water, thought Sanguine, as well as I am.

And true enough Sonny lead the to the ranch.

,,I knew I was right. We have a new neighbour."claimed a stocky muscular man clothed like Sonny and with similar features.

,,Meet my brother James, best ya ignore him."advised Sonny him.

,,Nice to meet you."greeted Billy him nonetheless.

,,Best ya come in. Soon there will be dinner and I want you to met my other siblings."

And he does.  
Billy meets all of them and he comes again to dinner.  
Soon he is a regular guest and even invited them back to dinner.

It is a long since he cooked the last time, suprisingly it is something he is still capable of.  
Then he repairs the house and even paints it new.  
Now it doesn't looks like a ruin anymore.  
Slowly he learns that they are a patchwork family with a pretty open view on relationships.  
And slowly his own morals are set new.  
He never had something against gays but they teach him that there is more in live.  
There isn't only hetero and homosexuality, some people can't even describe what peoples they like.  
His world becomes brighter and more colourful.

One day a cowboy from them gets fired after a big disagreement.  
The next day Billy is again in the saddle of a horse and helps them out.  
Not much long after this he signs a work contract and starts working seriously.  
It remembers him of the first day he was a cowboy long before he became a killer.  
Still it feels the same, the horse seems the same and he grows close with the others cowboys and cowgirls.

Soon he began to change physically too.  
His shoulders become broader from the hard work and his skin tans.  
Than his hair slowly faints from a dark blond to a light one.

Not long after the work contracts finish Billy leaves.  
It isn't the fault of anyone.

,,I need to see a bit of the world."says Billy.

Sonny nods and smiles, he understands and Billy leaves.

He works on different Ranches and never stays long, soon he discovers that he has a good hand with horses and soon other discovers this too.  
Suddenly all want him for the difficult horses and Billy has to admit he likes it.  
As a specialist for difficult horses he doesn't have to stay long and he doesn't get attached.

One or two times he meets a nice woman and they become intimate and have a bit fun, but it is never more.  
At least not for him, Tanith is still the woman he longs for.

,,Can't you stay?"asks a woman.  
She isn't only pretty but a nice woman and a friend for him.

,,No, can't."are Billy's only words.

The next day he is gone.

This all changes him too.  
The restlessness and the habit if not sleeping more then a week in one place begin too show.  
All fat from his lazy days vanishs and he becomes kind of skinny.

One day he meets a hell of a horse.  
It is a big, strong stallion with clever and devilish eyes.  
The fur isn't a dark black like one would imagine by such a horse.  
No, it seems like a mix of all colours.  
The horse is partly red, brown, black and yellow with sprinkle of white.  
Billy falls in love.

The horse is wild and fierce and nobody can ride him. They tried all to make him obey. The cowboys and girls tried to break him and the failed.  
It takes Sanguine weeks to gain the big horse's trust but in the end he succeeds.

Soon he sits on the horse that didn't let any cowboy or cowgirl sat on him.  
But the horse accepts no other rider and to make up for his failure Billy buys the horse.  
At least that is what he teels the rancher, in reality he wants the horse for himself.  
He is fed up with having a new horse everytime he goes somewhere new.

No he begins travelling by horse and feels less restless.  
Of course he doesn't stay anywhere anywhere longer, more of the contrary because it takes more time travelling by horse then by car or train.  
But now the horse is always with him.

One day Billy makes again contact with the life danger he thought he left behind.  
Of course it isn't too uncommon that a cowboy does.  
Either under the hoods of a cow or a furious bull or even under the hood of his own horse.  
But when bullets fly through the air, Billy feels different.

The next day Billy marches in a shop and gets two revolvers.  
Thanks America for it easy laws when it gets to weapon.  
He even registers his weapons and makes a certificate, so he can legally wear them.

But he first learns really shouting when a old man shows him how.

,,Son you can't just wear them you need to know them."and Billy takes the advice.  
It is a long time since he used a revolver and he let the old man show him how to use a revolver glady.

,,Thanks."says Billy and the next day he rides way.

One time he meets a few Indians or more correct native Americans.  
They tell him about there culture a bit and there normal day.  
Soon they part.

One day Billy meets a man to on horse and restless, they decide to travel together for the time being.  
A long time they just travel without a stop on a ranch and the avoid other humans.

Ine day the other man takes Billy be suprise and kisses him on the lips.  
It isn't a really messy and deep kiss, no tongue just there lips meeting.  
But Billy stiffened and doesn't response.

,,I thought you were gay. My mistake."mumeres the other and seems uncomfortable.

,,No not a mistake. Just a suprise and a first."

Then Billy kisses him and this time the kiss is messy and tongue is involved.  
Not much later Billy finds himself in bed with the man and he doesn't mind. 

After some while they part on good terms.

He returns to his home and visits Sonny and his family.  
Sometimes a few time in the year he does that, to not lose contact.


	2. Chapter 2

**Tanith**

After the remnant is finally away and the crisis with Darquesse is over,the guilt comes. Ghastly and Anton are alive, but it was a close thing and Ghastly doesn't smiles often. Tanith feels guilty for this too. With the guilt come the nightmares and Tanith has to take time of, off everything. Luckily her family gets involved and her brother finds her one day and helps her to get her shit together 

Not much later she finds work with her brother's help in the Londoner Sanctuary. She tells them that it is kind of charity work for all the bad she did, when she were a remnant and it is.

Her guilt becomes less with every hour of here work and when she saves lives, she smiles again.  
A few years later she heard that Valkyrie is back and travels to Ireland.

They talk and share experience.

,,And the I met this hot guy, you should have seen him. Wait I show you a pic."and Valkyrie shows her a picture and she agrees the guy is hot.  
Tanith smiles Valkyrie isn't a girl anymore, but a woman who now likes man and not boys like Fletcher.

,,How is it going with Ghastly?"ask Valkyrie.

Tanith expected the question, but she still flinches.

,,We haven't talked yet."admits Tanith.

,,Please ask him out. He waited so long for you and.. and you deserve to be happy Tanith."said Valkyrie sad.

,,Maybe. But what I have done..."

,,Not what you have done, what the Remmant has done."corrected Valkyrie her harsh.

,,Really? Am I not responsible for what the remnant has done? Then you shouldn't be resolved for what Darquesse has done too."shot Tanith back.

,,Damn it. I hate it when my own words are used against me."mumbled Valkyrie.

,,So you agree that I'm right?"asked Tanith.

,,Only when you agree that I am right too."gave Valkyrie back.

They both looked at each other and smiled.  
Then a ringing mobile phone broke the silence.

,,Typically Skullduggery. It is my own day off in the whole month and he gets in trouble and calls me."muttered Valkyrie.

,,What is it Skulldugery?"asked Valkyrie.

,,I can call later if it suits you."

,,I don't want you to call at all."

,,That isn't possible."replied Skulldugery.

,,Oh it is. Just don't call me and it is fine."

,,Do you want to hear it or not?"asked Skulldugery.

,,Not really, but if you want tell me..."

,,Drylan Scarab manages somehow to end the world."saud Skullduggery.

,,Has he broken out of prison?"asked Valkyrie.

,,No, that is the interesting point on the case."

,,Ah and why do you call me about a prisoner who hasn't broken out and is no treat in this moment?"asked Valkyrie.

,,The Sanctuary tries to solve problems no before they are serious dangers."

,,Sounds boring."commented Valkyrie.

,,Yes, but it saves money."admitted Skulldugery.

,,And what is now the reason to call me?"

,,Drylan Scarab has a son, who maybe dies what his father can't."remebered Skulldugery her.

,,Now I get it. You want to speak to Tanith, don't you?"

,,Yes."

,,Asshole."muttered Valkyrie and gave her mobile phone to Tanith.

,,Hy Skully."

,,You know you shouldn't call me this."muttered Skulldugery.

,,No,not really. Plus you want me to help you find my ex, who is a psycho and killer and says he loves me. Then you want me to convince him to help you save the world, or am I wrong?"asked Tanith dryly.

,,No, not really admitted Skulldugery


	3. Chapter 3

After his last visit by Sonny and his folks Sanguine went to an rodeo.  
It isn't really fate, more like a friend of him who drags him to the event.  
Soon Sanguine finds his taste in it and cherish the rodeo rider.

Not long after this he too is riding a bull again.  
The hooves flies in the earth and his puls races.  
But he soon enough retired from it after he has seen a cowboy fall.  
Ed was good and strong and young, but it doesn't saves him.  
The bull is merciless.  
Ed will never walk again.

Sanguine leaves the ring the same day.

Not much later he learns how bad rodeo is for the bulls too. He looks in the warm brown eyes of one of them, while the bull is written,he could swear he sees pain in it.

He takes his horse and goes, like he always does when something bad happens.  
Slowly he makes his way from town to town.  
A few days he realized were he is going.  
I am going nowhere.  
I have no purpose, no destination, no goal.

He felt hallow an empty shell. Kind of what Tanith was as a remnant. He had loved her and maybe still did, but she wasn't Tanith with a remnant. There had missing that one piece that made here Tanith.

He had loved her nonetheless.  
But he was too an idiot an livestock dog that followed his master, even through it got kicked for that all the time. Because Tanih, Remmant Tanith only used him, he knew that and still he wasn't able to leave her.

Then Darquesse ripped the Remmant out and Sanguine felt happy and sad at the same time. At least she was Tanith again, but he would never see her.  
He was bounded to not leave the USA or he would be thrown in a cell. The skeleton assured him of that personally. His littel sidekick stand next to him and kind of looked at him with sad eyes.

Valkyrie was Darquesse, he still had a hard time to believe this. But it kind of made sense, the time when the vision started and why Valkyrie looked so incredibly guilty. Now she was somewhere in the USA too.  
But not because she had to, but because she tried to heal from the whole disaster, Sanguine doubted somehow her ability too, but it really wasn't his problem.

Some time later he did one of his returns back to the house were he grew up.  
After settling there, he paid a visit to Sonny.

.......

But it was kind of strange after some years living in this world, Sanguin noticed it. Even trough Sonny tried to hide it.

,,What is going on?"

,,Nothingh."mumbled Sonny, but he said it like he wasn't convinced himself.

,,Yeah, if you want to convince me, you have to become a better liar."gave Sanguin with a snort back.  
Then he could practically see how Sonny the inner fight in Sonny.  
Should he tell Sanguin?or keep quit?

,,You are a killer."said Sonny then, slowly and like the words painted him.  
The moment Sonny said it Sanguin could see how it pained Sonny to say it, but that he believed it.  
And then he saw somethingh that Sanguin knew would be a problem in the future in Somnys face.  
It was fear.  
Sonny feared him.  
Feared what Sanguin could do....  
For a moment Sanguin considered denying it.  
But what was the point?  
Even trough he didn't killed anyone anymore.  
He had done it.

,,How so you found out?"asked Sanguin then slowly and carefully.

,,So, it is true. It ain't no lie?"asked Sonny and Sanguin could see the hope vanish from Sonnys face.  
For the first time, Sanguin felt ashamed to have killed.  
Felt ashamed to have ended a live.  
And then he felt ashamed for feeling ashamed only know.

,,You're a bloody killer. A murder."stated Sonny as a matter of fact.  
At that moment Sanguin felt like he had done something incredibly wrong.  
His thought went try and he looked away.

,,I am sorry."apologised Sanguin weekly, knowing it wouldn't change anything.

,,You're sorry?"asked Sonny dusbelieving.  
,,Sorry?"repeated Sonny and now he sounded angry, incredibly angry.  
,,That is all you can say? Sorry? What is with the family? Have you onmy said sorry to them too?"  
Hell Sonny sounded furious.

,,What else could I possibly say?  
I would want to change it, if I could?  
There is no possibility that I can.  
That I am ashamed of myself?  
I'm ashamed, but what does it help?  
That I would like to somehow make amends?"asked Sanguin back defeated.  
Because he could say this, but......it all seemed impossible.

,,Couldn't ya at least have told me?"asked Sonny back.

,,I could have, but how. Hello I'm Sanguin and I'm a killer. But don't ya worry? Because I ain't killing ya?"shot Sanguin back.

,,Maybe it would've been difficult...."admitted Sonny ,,but it would've been honest."

,,I ain't a good men."gave Sanguin back.  
And he knew he was right with this and it felt sad.  
I ain't a good men.  
But I tried, thought Sanguin.  
Not for long, that was sure, but he had tried.....

,,No."said Sonny back.  
Somhow that hurt the worst.

,,You ought to go."said Sonny then.  
That hurt almost as much.

For a short moment Sanguin froze. Then he gave a short nod and left.

.......

Back in his house Sanguin felt frustrated.  
It was strange suddenly to feel ashamed for somethingh he had been so long.  
But the world moves on.  
That is just how it is.

But still Sanguin wanyed to know who told Sonny and why.  
And if everyone else here knew.....  
That would be bad, knew Sanguin, the village was quick to judge and spread rumours.  
But there was oy one way to find out.....

.........

Going into the local supermarket felt like a walkt to the electric chair.  
Sanguin could feel every glare on him and see them judging him harshly.

Taking something random (a milk) Sanguin walks over pay, to treat his theory. After all it could be somethingh diffrent......

As there is no queue he has mit to wait, but as soon as he wants to pay he gets interrupted.

,,We ain't serve people of your kind."growls the guy at him.  
Which is pretty harsh, but if they know he us a killer...  
But Sanguin still has to ask, he has to be sure.

,,What do ya mean?"asks Sanguin and he can hear himself, how weak his voice sounds.  
After all they know that he knows what they know.  
At least he thinks.

,,Killers. Or do you want to deny it?"asks the guy angrily.  
Never once has Sanguin been confronted with this. It just was never an issue.

,,No."says Sanguin and turnes around and goes.  
No point in arguing here, he would only lose.  
But he is sure too, that in the other shop they are as he knows, not so direct. At least he hopes so.

They still look at him funny, but they ain't say anything and Sanguin can live with that.

**Thanith**

They sent her alone to investigate. Looking around Tanith finds it strange that Sanguin is home here. It just seems lonely. The houses have a wide distance beween them and the land is flat and just wide.

As soon as the house of Sanguin comes into view she slows down and takes a good look. It looks old, but then it is old. And it looks lonely too. Thanith knows Sanguin is alone and she feels almost sad for him. Skullduggery told her that he lives oy sometimes here and when not travels around. The Skeleton found that all out when he questioned the neighbour, Sanguin apparently talks too.

,,You can come in. You know I ain't bite?"asks suddenly voice from inside the house and Tanith looks instantly at him.

He has change, thinks Tanith. But not for the good, he looks exhausted and sad, as if he feels a weigh soon his shoulders.

,,You look tired."says Thanith carefully. 

,,And you look beautiful."says Sanguin and sighs. At this moment he seems incredibly old. She cannot help it, but compare him to Ghahsy, Anton and Valkyrie. They all changed more for worse than better. But none of them looks so utterly exhausted.

,,What do ya want? I get the feeling it ain't my smarth phone number. Even trough I would totally give it to you."adds Sanguin and she can her his amusement.

,,We will never happen."relies Thanith sharply and she means it ,,I still have some standard and I just don't date killers." She still can't believe that she dated Sanguin. Even trough she has heard many things about her remant her, she doesn't remeber a damn thingh. That is a part of why she us here to, she wants to know what age did.

After she says it Sanguin blushes deeply and the grin fades from his face. He mutters ,,Of course ya do. So what do you want?"

,,Right now? I would like a nice cute cowboy hat and an ice cream. Plus I would like to know, what you know about your fathers plans to destroy the world."

**Sanguin.**

His father. 

It seems long ago since he last saw him and Sanguin doesn't care to see his father again soon. He is more than fine with his father dying somewhere alone in a prison cell.

To see Thanith after all this time and knowing that she us only here because if business..... it hurts. She is still beautiful, smart and his love. That he is still only the enemy in her eyes....hurts. Right now, every person that seems to matter to him hurts him. One way or the other and somehow Sanguin is even always at least partly responsible for it.

But his father isn't his fault. 

,,Go to hell."says Sanguin and dies what he hasn't done a long time. He uses his magic and disappears.

**Thanith**

,,That went well."mutters Thanith to herself. Sighing she begins to text Skulldugery and Valkyrie to come and help her search for Sanguin.

........

**Sanguin.**

Since the day the whole city somehow learned he is bisexual and Sonny knows he is a killer Sanguin goes to Dallas for a drink. He did it before too, but now he does it always. It seems sad to him, that the are still people out there, who believe it isn't right to be gay.

But he doesn't has the energy to argue with every of them, not now. Sipping at his drinks he looks around, wondering what his father did thus time.

Thinking about his father brings always back some bad memories. Memories Sanguin would forget if he could.

**Sonny**

After the day he confronted Billy bout the murder, Sonny feels like it should've gone diffrent. Damn it he thinks, I miss him.

_You miss a killer, says a voce in his head._

I miss a friend, a good neighbour, argues Somny back.

_Maybe too you, but dies the guy he killed cares about this._

Maybe not, but Billy isn't only a killer he's more. He's nice to talk too, helpful, funny.

_Only funny, if he isn't killing ya._

,,Ya thinking about him again, don't ya?"asks his older brother softly.

,,I just don't get it out if my head. He killed someone James. He ended a life, ended an existence. However you put it, it seems impossible to believe a good person would do this."says Sonny and he feels like his heart is falling apart. Billy is a killer. Billy his friend, an former employee.

,,I know."replies Jane's and he sounds sad too.

,,What should I do? Talk to him? Ignore him forever?"asks Sonny and Hope's his brother knows more.

,,I don't know."that definitely isn't the reply Sonny hoped for.

,,There is the detective again, he wants to take to you Sonny."introduces his ma the tall guy she brings with her. Sonny jumps a littel, suprised he didn't heard them.

,,What do ya want?"asks Sonny, a littel impolite. But damn it, the day was long and exhausting.

,,I would like to talk about Billy-Ray again."says the tall guy, tilting his head slightly. 

,,What is it ya want to know?"asks Sonny anoyed, defensive and...afraid. He can't shake the possibility that Sanguin might kill again. That this guy will tell him Sanguin did kill.

,,Where would he go, if he us upset? Where would he stay? Any friends perhaps?"asks the tall guy. He would stay here things Sonny, or at least he would've until I knew he's a killer. But know? He hasn't any friends left things Sonny. And he feels guilty.

,,No friends. But there is a bar in Dallas...."

**Sanguin**

Thanith.......

 _I have standards, says a littel voice._ Reminding him off the ugly truth, that he is a killer. Not good enough for the woman he loves.

Sonny.....

 _You are a killer._ He can practically here Sonnys voice, disappointed, broken and angry. But scared nonetheless. Sonny might not know it, but Sanguin will be now always a threat. A killer, a lunatic, a danger.

Ghastly......

 _Scarface. You are ugly. Did he fall into a mixer when he was littel?_ That aren't Ghastlys words, they are his. Sanguin knows that someone else would be ashamed of them, would deny them. But Sanguin can't help it, he would say them all over again.

His father.....

 _I never wanted a son._ That sentence will probably always hurt the most.

Sanguin.....

 _I ain't a good man._ Nothingh he said about himself was probably ever that honest.

.......

**Sonny**

Seeing Sanguin again feels good. Even trough he us a murder, he is still a friend and Sonny wants to know the whole story. He wants to know why Sanguin killed someone and if he really is such a bad person.

,,You're in trouble."sats Sonny as soon as he sits down, next to Sanguin, who is currently drinking a beer.

,,I know."acknowledges Sanguin ,,Why are you here Sonny?" Sanguin sounds tired.

,,Ya may be a killer, but you're my friend and I want just to know it."says Sonny. Carefully eyeing Sanguin up and down.

,,You want to know what?"asks Sanguin confuesed.

,,I want to know why you killed."says Sonny then and he can see Sanguin tense. Can see how the words seem to frighten Sanguin.

,,You don't want to know."relies Sanguin then. As if he knows better then Sonny, what Sonny can bear to know.

,,No, you're wrong. I want to know."says Sonny. And thinks, there us so much more I want to know. Are you really that bad? Would you kill me too? Are you dangerous? Were you in prison or did you get away with it?

,,You may think you want to know, but...."tries Sanguin to change his mind.

,,Don't try to make me think about it another time. I am sure and I want to know. So tell me. What can it hurt, now anymore?"asks Sonny. And both know the unspoken words that seem to hang in the air, between them.

_What can it hurt, for me to know? After all it won't ever change the fact that you're a killer._

,,It was for money."says Sanguin then and then he adds ,,Do you want to know even more. Do you want to know the whole truth?"asks Sanguin.

**Sanguin**

For a moment he tries to figure out why he even gives Somny the opportunity to ask him all about the murders. Right know Sinny may think he killed for money, but at least he thinks it was just once.

But deep down Sanguin knows why Sonny is allowed to know. No, deep down he knows why Sonny has the right to ask and know.

_He was your friend_

Even trough he won't be Sanguins friend after he has asked. Or at least every opportunity for them to become friends again while be destroyed.

**Sonny**

How bad can it be? Thinks Sonny after all he knows that Sanguin killed for money. It can't get worse. Maybe Sanguin will even have a _better_ reason.

,,Then tell me. Tell me everything."says Sonny and looks at Sanguin.

,,I was a killer for hire. An assassin or at least kind of."say Sanguin and looks back at Sonny. Even trough Sanguin wears Sunglasses Sonny can feel Sanguins glare.

,,How do you mean killer for hire?"asks Sonny and tries to make sense of it. Or to be more honest tries to deny it. This can't be, Sanguin can't be.... 

,,It was my job. I killed people and got money for it."says Sanguin and sighs.

,,How...? How could you...? It is the biggest of all sins and......you did it for money.....?"asks Sonny and swallows ,,You did it for money....and you did it as a....as a _job?"_ and Sonny seems unable to believe this. Stares at Billy and can't help it. Again they both know again the unspoken words that hang in the air.

_You are a bad man. The worst._

,,Don't you see, you would have been better not to ask. To lieve in peace."says Sanguin and he seems to pity Sonny. At least that is what Sonny thinks the expression on Sanguins face means.

,,Hiw can you lieve with this guilt? Knowing that you were..... that you are ......?"asks Sonny unable to put it in words what he thinks Sanguin is.

,,I don't really feel guilty, not even now."admits Sanguin and again it seems like he is pitying Sonny.

,,But how? Don't you ever asked for forgiveness or tried to be better?"asked Sonny unable to look away or go away. Unable to save himself from the agony this talk brings him.

,,No."replies Sanguin without hesitation.

,,But what us with the laws? What dies your family say? Or the bible? Don't you believe in _anything?_ "asks Sonny.

,,No. I don't, because if I do than the only relation I come to, is that the god who made this world must be incredibly cruel."says Sanguin and looks at Sonny as if he is the crazy one, for believing in God.

,,But.....? How....? Why....?"stutters Sonny unable to complete a sentence.

,,Oh Sonny."sats Sanguin and looks almost tender at him ,,look around you. Look at the world. We fight wars, ignore human rights,change the climate...... there is so may wrong."points Sanguin out.

,,But there is so many good out there, too! I mean people fight for peace and don't use violence. Or they demonstrate for human rights and climate change. People give to charity and try to make the world better."argues Sonny.

,,Maybe they try, but I fear it is to littel and to late."says Sanguin with a sad smile.

,,Do you really don't care about the lives you took. Was there never a moment you wanted to be _good?_ Didn't you at least once wanted to be loved?"asks Sonny. Right now he can't figure out why he is even asking. Sanguin is a _killer._ But he us still there, arguing with him.

**Sanguin**

_Didn't you at least once wanted to be loved?_

The sentence seems to lugh at him. And Sanguin thinks, I did. I wanted her to love me as I loved her. But she didn't and she will never, because I am a killer. Sanguin realises then that the terror and sadness on Sonny face are part of the reason, why he and Thanith can never be. 

Because he is a killer. Even trough he hasn't killed for a while, he still is. If he wanted to, he could kill Sonny right now. But he doesn't want to. But Sonny us only one person, he doesn't want to kill and he has the feeling it isn't enough.

**Sonny**

,,Once I wanted to be loved. I love her, but she'll never return the feeling. Out of the same reason we will never be friends again."says Sanguin. 

For a short moment Sonny wants to argue. Wants to say that they can be friends again. That he can get over Sanguin past. But right know Sonny knows that won't happen.

,,Killimg isn't your past, isn't it? You haven't stopped being a killer....you are still one, aren't you?"asks Sonny, already knowing the answer.

,,I thought I wasn't. That I stopped, that it was my past, when I came to the house."admits Sanguin and Sonny can't supress the hope.

,,So say, that it is your past."orders Sonny him and hopes.

,,Oh Sonny. You are right. I am still a killer and I will be in the future too."says Sanguin and almost seems sad.

,,But what is with the woman you loved don't you think sometimes _what if....?"_ asks Sonny sadly. And thinks I am crazy for still being here, I speak to a killer!

,,Sometimes I do. But that are oy daydreams and they won't come true."says Sanguin.

,,Please Billy..... you could be better than this. You could be _good."_ tries Sonny.

,,No I can't."answers Sanguin.

,,But you could be loved! You could be happy, dam it."snaps Somny angirly.

,,I could be happy? Do you really think I am unhappy because I am a killer?"asks Sanguin and smiles a wicked smile.

,,I do."almost whispers Sonny and meets Sanguin gaze ,,Nothingh feels as good as to love and be loved. And I can't imagine that it gives you any joy to kill. Because killing is taking and never giving back. And even trough you might think taking is better than giving it isn't. The moments you feel the happiest are when you grieve without asking. When you sacrifice somethingh for someone who matters."

Sonny looks at Sanguin and he thinks he spots for a moment understanding. Maybe he can convince Sanguin after all to be better.

,,Don't you ever have done anything selfless? I believe it felt better than being completly selfish. And I believe that you like to love her. That you like how it makes you feel and that you want to love more, not less."ends Sonny then and he thinks. Yes, I have won. Sanguin seems to understand and he might get better.

Maybe Sanguin will never be his friend again, but one day he could have a real friend and he could be better. Be could love that woman and one day maybe find someone who he loves and returns the feelings.

**Sanguin**

_I love her_

The three words that hurt the most. The words that haunt him. Even trough he was impolite to Thanith and pushed her away, he loves her and he will never stop.

,,I love her."says Sanguin and it feels good, to admit this. Somhow it feels free.

,,You see?"asks Sonny and smiles brightly.

,,Don't you get it Sonny? I love her."

**Sonny**

,,But that is good."insists Sonny and smiles.

,,No,it isn't."sats Sanguin ,,because I can't be the guy she wants."

,,But Billy...."starts Sonny while his smile falters.

,,One last thingh."says Sanguin and gestures for Sonny to come closer.

,,Yes?"asks Sonny hopefully.

Sanguin leans to Sonny and almost smiles as be says ,,You are wrong. Killing is fun."

.......

**Scarab**

Still after all the time he had spent in prison, he hadn't adopted to it. He still longed for his freedom....and the opportunity to kill. Of course dud he knew it would have to wait, but not to long.

After so much time in prison, the only thingh he wanted before he would finally die was to revenge himself and make the ones who put him in the prison suffer.

Looking out of his cell Skarab could see the Cleaver, always on watch, ready to act the second they had. But if everything went after his plan, they wouldn't have time. But not yet.

Soon, promised Skarab himself. Not yet but soon. Then he would make them pay.

**Skulldugery**

It seemed like time was running short. And he had yet to find Sanguin. But lucky enough he knew a nice shortcut.

,,Why are we still standing in the parking lot?"asked Valkyrie and he could hear her annoyance. Almost like the old days. Almost. After she hadn't come back to Ireland Skulldugery had been worried she would never and he ought too. After all she was still in the USA.

,,We wait until Sonny comes out."answered Skulldugery slowly.

,,Why? I am sure he isn't too upset if we interrupt.....plus his do you know Sanguin doesn't kill him? I just mean.....there us alive on stake we should act....."

,,We still don't go in."decided Skulduggery. Which made Valkyrie roll her eyes.

Then the door opened and Sonny came out. Even trough he looked angered and sad, he wasn't dead, which was definitely a plus.

,,So now we can go."saud Valkyrie and smiled happily.

,,You know, that you could learn a littel patience, it wouldn't hurt?"asked Skulldugery amused.

,,Oh you may think that. But somtimes for example in a fight, there is no room for patience."replied Valkyrie and just walked in.

....

It wasn't difficult to spot Sanguin, after all be sat alone in a corner, glaring daggers at everyone who dared coming near him.

,,Sanguin. What a nice coincidence meeting you. We were actually searching for you. So how about we chat a littel?"asked Valkyrie and smiled brightly at him.

,,You followed Sonny, didn't you?"asked Sanguin suspiciously.

,,Wasn't hard."said Skulldugery.

,,So, what do you littel stalkers want?"asked Sanguin narrowing his eyes.

,,Well, you could start with coming with us and answer a few questions."suggested Skulldugery.

,,No thanks, I prefer Texas."replied Sanguin coldly.

,,We could interrogate you in Texas."suggested Skulldugery.

,,I didn't wanted to say this, but you practically forced me. I don't like you."snapped Sanguin.

Tilting his head looked Skulldugery at the killer ,,If I didn't knew better I would get the feeling that you don't want us here."

,,Trust that feeling."replied Sanguin with a snort.

,,What is with a compromise?"asked Valkyrie,,you answer us a few questions and we don't just take beat you up and take you into custody."

,,You usally beat your suspects up and then take them into custody?"asked Sanguin.

,,Yes, that is our secret to success."replied Valkyrie grinning.


	4. Chapter 4

**Anton**

,,Tell me again, why we use my hotel."demanded Anton glaring daggers at Skulldugery.

,,It is a neutral zone and we need a littel privacy."answered the Skeleton toting his head.

,,If you need the privacy to beat your suspects up. Then search somewhere else for privacy."growled Anton.

,,I am sorry if I damaged your reputation with that incident."apologised Skulldugery.

,,Incident? More like an disaster."muttered Anton.

,,Disaster then. Still, can we use your Hotel?"asked Skulldugery.

,,You can, but don't you dare to make another disaster out of this."demanded Anton and turned away.

**Ghastly**

Seeing her again hurt and made him happy at the same time. Of course he wanted to see her alive and well, but he still wanted to go out with her.

,,Thanith."greeted Ghastly her finally.

,,Ghastly. You look good."greeted Thanith him back, smiling a littel bit.

,,Thank you, you do too. I wondered if I could sit to you, catch up with you?"asked Ghastly smiling shyly at her. Even trough he was over 400 years old, flirting still wasn't his strength. Saracen would probably lough at his tryst to flirt with Tanith.

,,Sure, sit down. So what did you do?"asked Thanith.

,,Well I worked at my shop."answered Ghastly vague, not sure if Thanith would appreciate to talk about clothes. ,,What did you do?"asked Ghastly then.

,,I took a job at the sanctuary in Englad for a while, I left yesterday."added Thanith.

,,Why?"asked Ghastly baffled.

,,It was time to move on. Even trough it was nice for some time, it wasn't something for me."

,,Okay good."

And then......silence. Noth often themseemed unable to keep the conversation going. Even after Thanith and Ghastly both made a few more attempts. But somhow it seemed always to fade into silence.

Great thought Hhastly as he sat there. Niw he finally saw Thanithagain and didn't knew what to say. Just great.

**Dexter**

,,Why is he helping us?"asked Gracpius suspiciously pointing at Sanguin. The very same question Dexter wanted to ask.

,,You know that I am right here? Why don't you ask _me?"_ asked Sanguin eye rolling.

,,I mean he is a annoying killer with a bad taste in clothes. What on that man suggest we should trust him?"asked Gracoius looking at Skulldugery and demanding an answer.

,,I can agree with the fact that I am a killer and I may be sometimes be annoying........ But I don't have a bad taste in clothing."snapped Sanguin.

,,You are wearing a cowboy hat and in genarrly look like you just came out of an western movie. That is practically the definition of bad taste."argued Gracious.

,,It isn't."shot Sanguin back crossed his arms and sulked.

,,You are right there is no reason to trust Sanguin."agreed Skulldugery.

,,I am right?"asked Gracious and added ,,don't get me wrong,I like being right, but I thought you had a reason to trust him."

,,Sanguin?"asks Skulldugery then ,,Can you tell us a reason to trust you?"

And suddenly everyone looks at him, waiting. No demanding an answer. Why should we trust you? And Sanguin thinks hell if I know.

For a moment he considers saying it is Tanith. But that would be a lie. Then he thinks, hell why am I here? Not for Thanith, sure enough not to do something good.....

,,Because I want revenge."says Sanguin then. And the answer supposes him actually.

,,You want revenge? On your own father?"asks Ghastly not trying to hide his disbelief. 

,,I want revenge on my father. He is a terribl person and I want revenge. I think that ought to be enough reason for you to trust me. I am going to excuse myself."finish Sanguin and left. Or more accurate fless. Without looking at them,Sanguin can feel their questioning stares. He doesn't want to answer them.

Going outside seems to help and it almost suppresses the coldness that creeps up inside him and wraps itself around his heart. Almost. But it isn't enough and he begins to remeber with a bitter taste in his mouth.

_I never wanted a son._

Interesting thinks Sanguin bitterly, how I am still not over that sentence. Said so long ago and it still stings.

**Valkyrie**

,,That is it? We just trust him? Because he wants to get revenge against his own father?"asks Valkyrie with an raised eyebrow.

,,I am with Valkyrie on this occasion. I don't trust him."agress Ghastly.

,,But we have to. Thingh about it, he is closer or at least has been closer to Skarab then anyone ever has been."argues Skulldugery. He seems sure if himself and his reasoning.

,,What do you know that we don't?"asks Valkyrie looking him in his eyes or more correct eye sockets.

,,I don't know what you mean."says Skulldugery vaguely. But Valkyrie knows him still, even after the break.

,,You are lying. You know somethingh that we don't. Probably why Sanguin despises his father so much that he is ready to help us."concludes Valkyrie watching Skulldugery closely. Knowing she must be right.

,,Ask him if you want to know it."with that Skulldugery closes his mouth, not ready to say anything more.

**Sanguin**

Looking around the landscape is just to familiar, thinks Sanguin. It seems to remeber him of so much and currently nothingh good. In his head he can still hear Sonnys voice asking him all thses questions about the murders. Hoping that Sanguin still is somehow good, that threre is a justification, for the terrible things Sanguin has done.

_There are none_

Knowing it will gain him nothingh Sanguin takes his smart phone out and checks it for any new messages. Nothingh. But what should he have expected? After all the only things he said to Sonny were cruel and mean. Even trough they were honest things.

_Killing is fun._

One of the true things he said, but would take back notheless. Deep down he misses Sonny. Misses the friend he had and he knows that there maybe will be no other friend again. That thus was probably the last misstep on his way down to well....hell probably.

_I miss you._

The thought seems to dominate all Sanguin can think about. He misses to have someone listening to him. Misses someone caring about him. Damn it he misses even arguing with Sonny. 

Looking at his phone again, he scrolls down trough his contact. There are Dusk, the Baron (who is dead ), some former clients he just didn't bothered to delete. And then there is Sonny and that it was.

Knowing he probably shouldn't do thus Sanguin opens thre chat and hesitates, but he can't stop himself. Slowly he writes what he wants to say so desperately.

_I miss you._

**Ghastly**

,,I don't like this."mutters Ghastly looking out of the window. They are still in Texas, but they won't be much longer. Ghastly can't wait to go home. Neither the landscape nor the people here are somethingh Ghastly cares right now, to learn more about.

,,I neither."admits Shudder and steps closer looking to outside. Right now with no other guest Shudder has time to tend to his friends.

,,Sanguin seems like the worst possible choice for an ally,still Skulldugery chose him."growls Ghartly. And I can't stand that guy, thinks Ghastly.

,,He must have a reason and he is right when it comes to the point that Sanguin must know more then any of us about his father."

**Dexter**

,,Has your father any friends which would consider getting him out of prison?"asked Dexter hoping that would put an end to the whole thingh.

,,No."replied Sanguin simply with no explanation. Just no. The farthest away from a helpful answer.

,,Where would he hide, if he got out?"asked Dexter. Hoping the next answer would be useful.

,,I don't know."answered Sanguin.

This answer was useless too.

,,Do you know anything?"asked Dexter annoyed.

,,I know that my father has a plan and a good one too, if he wants out of prison. "

,,That is not helpful......"

**Sonny**

_I miss you_

Not what Sonny expected, but after all Billy was a killer, what could you expect. It wasn't like he was normal......he's a killer. I am writing with a killer realised Sonny. A killer....a man who took lives....for money.

His heart seemed to struggle with beating and his chest tightened. Billy is a killer, Sonny still couldn't believe it, maybe he would never. Hiw could one believe that a friend was a killer.

_Killing is fun_

Remembering the things Billy told him made him shudder. How could he ever say this? Ever feel this...? How?

,,Do you still think about him? Let it go, brother, move on."advised James him standing next to him. 

,,It isn't that easy."muttered Sonny, feeling so lost. What should he do?

,,Really? He's a killer, he isn't someone you should gave ANY contact with, whatsoever."argued James concered. 

,,So what? He's a killer? Does that makes him completly bad? I don't believe this and you know it, brother. No one is completely bad and not without a reason."added Sonny, thinkg about Sanguin again. Why was his former friend a killer? Had he a reason, a ground a trauma which .....broke him?

,,Maybe he isn't completely bad, but he is really near being it. So stay away brother. Maybe once someone could have changed him, but if you ask me? He's a lost cause."replied James without hesitation.

While Sonny looked in his brother dark, brown eyes. He realised that James wanted to keep him save, far away from Sanguin. He didn't cared in the last about the guy Sonny brought at this very house.

,,Maybe, but I won't find out until I try."pointed Sonny out. Knowing that this probably was completely bullshit. But then, it wasn't like he had somethingh better to do. His family could do without him for a while.

,,Your tricking nuts. He is a KILLER. What of that you don't get?"snapped James angily.

,,I get it! But I don't think he will kill me as soon as I get near him. He could have done that a dozen times."pointed Sonny out.

,,We need you here."tried James.

,,No you don't. You can do without means we all know it. At some point I would have gone, now I just go a littel earlier."

**Dexter**

,,The guy is useless, Skull."started Dexter breathing in and trying to supress his anger. Why the hell did they needed Sanguin, anyway?

,,Come on Dex, you are just asking the wrong questions, you have to be better. More like a detective, more like........me"replied Skullduggery.

,,More like you? So it is just the questions I ask? Then go on you great detective God and show me, how it is done."challenged Dexter him.

,,With pleasure."

..........

,,You father is a planet isn't he?"was the very first question Skulldugery asked.

,,Sure he is. Nothingh he does is without a plan, he even considers diffrent possibilies, just in case."replied Sanguin raising an eyebrow ,,how is this going to help ya catch him?"

,,None of your concern, bust answer. Leave the thinking to the ones with a brain."

,,I have a brain."snapped Sanguin back, sulking.

,,It must be very littel."muttered Dexter, which Sanguin ignored.

,,Let us not concentrate on this now, okay? So your father will have a back up plan?"asked Skullduggery then.

,,Sure, maybe he'll even have a backup plan for the backup plan."

,,Who would be part of this plan?"

,,One, maybe two persons. Only as much as needed, probably one from the inside too."

,,There are only cleavers."pointed Skullduggery out, tilting his heard.

,,And how does this affect the plan? You can act as if you're a Cleaver and get in like this. No problem whatsoever."argued Sanguin shrugging.

,,Because of that they check the Cleaver, make sure that they really are, what they pretend to be. The sanctuary isn't dump."muttered Dexter.

,,Then take a ripper, a former cleaver for hire."

,,If course, I should have considered that."muttered Skulldugery.

,,We have to get to the prison, immediately."

**Jeremiah**

Getting in wasn't hard. It was almost too easy and for a second he though it was a trap and he tensed, ready to react. But in the end, it was only easy and nobtrapp whatsoever.

While he was walking trough the floors he had to admit that it was easy to fall back into, old habits. His body moved the way it used to, a time so long ago. Of course he was diffrent back then, full of passion for system he didn't believed anymore.

But even then he hadn't been like the others, somehow the brainwashing didn't worked as well as it should have. And he was still an individual, a some, he had a name. Unless normal cleaners he saw himself when he looked into the mirror and not just a part of a bigger thingh. Not a thingh, but a someone.

,,You took your time."greeted Skarab him, looking at him coldly. Jeremiah ignored the impoliteness. Be was here for money, nothingh more and nothingh less.

,,Didn't knew we were in a hurry."replied Jeremiah and eyed the man he was going to free. He was awfully old.

,,You sure you don't die of old age, before we get out if here?"

,,Concered."

,,I want my money."

,,Then get me out of here."

,,Easy enough."

**Sanguin**

,,Judging from all the blood on the floors around, we are to late, aren't we?"asked Sanguin eyeing the mess of blood,but surprisingly no corpses. 

,,Were are the corpses?"asked Dexter, before Sanguin could ask that too.

,,Suprisinlgy enough there are no corpses, only wounded."answered a nervous Sanctuary worker. Eying Sanguin as if he was about to eat him. No something Sanguin planned on.

,,A bad guy with a conscience? Sounds strange."remarked Tanith, thinhing out loud.

,,Or he thought that they could get catches and didn't wanted a sentence for killing."pointed Saracen out.

,,No, he has a conscience."muttered Sanguin trying to remeber the guy, he had never done time ago."

,,You know the guy, who did it?"asked Dexter suprised, raising an eyebrow.

,,I do, kind of at least."replied Sanguin looking Dexter triumphantly in the eyes.

,,I can't believe I am saying this, but maybe you really are useful."

,,I don't know if this is a compliment or not, but I am going to take it as one."

,,Oh, don't do that. I would feel bad if you felt good, because if somethingh I said."

**Sonny**


End file.
